Happy and stressed out~

It has been a week now since I started working. Life has been hectic and I can’t say that everything went on smoothly. I cannot cheat myself by saying that I am not stressed out. I am, but I am still surviving. I have my husband and my mom around. They are very helpful and understanding, I am lucky.

Pumping bmilk while working is one stressful task. You want to do your work and be discreet when excusing yourself to take a break for pumping and it is easier said than done. I’ve missed one or two pumping session due to meetings and most of the time it is kinda obvious that I am not at my place during office hr because the clinic is so far away from my dept. *sigh*. I need to file a request to HR for a better feeding/pumping facilities. It is okay if they cannot provide a fridge for each pumping room, but at least they can provide a room and a sink for washing the pump parts. I am tired of walking back and forth to the clinic 3 times a day. 20-25 minutes walk back and forth plus 20 minutes pumping time, it took 40 to 45 minutes a session. I can do it right now since the project is still in development stage but what will happen when I need to work fullforce mid 2009? *die* I am worried thinking about balancing my work with my responsibilities being a mother to Zara. I hope I will survive. I need a lot of prayers.

On a lighter note, Zara is one adorable baby. She does her soft “merengek” sound asking for ppl to pick her up when she is bored or when the weather is too hot. She does the same thing when she need milk. She is not fussy, but she knows how to get attention when she needs one. We seldom hear her cry. She loves a good bath and will smile and laugh inside the water. She loves to watch the lights and the fans and smile. She like to watch things around her and sometime with a serious face, as if she is thinking about something. 🙂 No sign of her flipping herself yet and I can’t wait for her first word to come out. Hopefully it will be “ma” hehe..

Btw, Zara is 6.2kg now. If not careful, she can be overweight by the time she is 3 months old hehe.. Zara is adjusting well with me working during the day. My mom told me that she hated the teats and she will make a sad face while being fed. Poor baby.. She knows that we will leave for work at 8.30 a.m., so she will wake up and asked to be feed and cuddled at around 8a.m. It is so hard for me to leave her at home. Thank god my mom is around, so I have one less thing to worry about.

I admit that I am stressed out but I am happy at the same time. I hope it is normal. Maybe, like Zara, I am adjusting too. Adjusting to my new role as a working mother and wife. I hope I will get used to it fast so that I am more happy and less stressed out. I want to be happy!

Darling hubby, I am sorry if you feel that I am neglecting you, even a tiny bit. I didn’t mean it and I am trying to be a good wifey to you too. It’s just that Zara is so small and adorable and she needs extra attention now. I hope you will understand and I love you so much~~ Without you, there will be no Zara and I will not have the privilege to be a mother. I am so thankful to you for being there for me and helping out with house work. You rock! 🙂

Okay, it is time for pumping.
I need to run.


2 thoughts on “Happy and stressed out~

  1. aaaah, tengok gambar zara selalu buat sayer tersenyum.. mak dia memang nampak happy pon, happy dan makin cantek :p pumping milk? the very the interesting la.. keep it up mom!

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